Hello. Is that even the right way to start this? I don't actually know, it has been so long. Having not written a blog post for over a year I have found myself itching to get back to writing lately. My inner Carrie Bradshaw has reared her head and the words are finally flowing after all this time. Previously I'd written my blog for ten years and I think it was safe to say that I'd reached a stale mate. I didn't really know where I was going with it all and genuinely felt as though I had nothing to say. Looking back now, it wasn't just my blog where I was facing that issue, it was my life in general and maybe that's why it became so difficult to write in this space.
A lot has changed for me (again) in the past year. I have moved back home with my parents following a relationship breakdown, which, if we were really being honest, had ended a long, long time ago. Shortly after I moved back with my parents we headed into the first Lockdown of 2020. It was tough, but then wasn't it for most people!? Although I struggled, a lot, I think a big part of that was my healing. It was me finding myself, discovering who I was again.
The time brought me closer to my family and not just my immediate family but my extended family too. I re-connected with them and feel as though I have built a far stronger bond which I should never have really lost. I had a lot of time to think about life and what I wanted from it. I began to get myself organised and I completed jobs that I had been putting off for years, it felt and still feels great to know that I have accomplished that.
I genuinely don't feel as though I could have achieved all that I have had we not have been in lockdown. It came at an imperative time in my life. It was what I needed and I'm so grateful for it. After a couple of months in lockdown I was so ready to return back to some form of normality though. I really appreciated returning back to work. I found it a lot harder working from home, it was a lot harder than I thought it would have been and I seriously missed my colleagues. I was also feeling ready for adventure too, it had been a while. I was lucky to get out and spend some time with a couple of friends, I'll share more of what we got up to in another post. Ultimately I felt ready to kick start my life again. A fresh start. It was time. There was only so much Netflix, Disney + and TikTok that could pass my time.
I went into 2020 feeling anxious and scared, I felt a bit lost and had no idea what direction my life was heading. I barely left the house during the first lockdown and I don't mind admitting I didn't want to go out. There have been various lockdowns and tier changes since then, I can't say that I feel the same way as I did back in March and I'm happy that this is now the case. I intend to continue living my life to the fullest, however that may look in the current climate. 2020 has been an experience for sure.
~ Gem x
