Bath

Having not blogged for seven months I'm now feeling like I have a lot to catch up with.  There's way too much to do a general update so I'm going to publish a number of posts over the next few weeks with what's been going on, starting off with a short break to Bath back in February.

It's a place that holds memories for me from a time in my life where I was very happy, but also a part of my past which I often try not to think about, just because it's easier to try to forget.  I felt really apprehensive about returning and in fact on reflection,  a lot of this year has been about re-visiting places from my past which, at times has felt very difficult and still quite raw but I want to create new memories and to push myself forwards.

The trip turned out to be really lovely, especially returning to the Therme Spa, that place really is such a treat.  I love all the different scented steam rooms, and that rooftop pool, well I could spend hours up there. If ever you are visiting and time allows you to visit I would really recommend it, although aim to get there as early as you can, ideally at opening time as it does get busy and once they reach capacity it then works on a one out one in basis and the queues can get pretty long. 

Of course all of the main sites and tourist attractions of the city were visited.  A visit to Bath would not be complete without stopping by the Roman Baths.  It is hard to imagine how it all must have looked around the area all those years ago but I love how they've introduced the new with the old in the city, it really does work quite well. 

The weather was lovely during the weekend I visited.  It was cold but the sun shone the entire time and it felt like Spring.  It was perfect for walks past the circus and up to the Royal Crescent.  I often wonder who lives in those huge houses and what their lives must be like having people continuously snapping photos of their front doors.  Talk about pressure to keep it looking in tip top condition.  Then again I can't imagine it is cheap to live there so they most likely have staff to do that for them, but I think if it were me I'd much rather do it myself.   

Walks along the river and through the park were also enjoyed.  Finished off with coffee and cake in the cute little tea room inside Pultney Bridge where I finally managed to get one of the tables by the window (*enter smug expression here*).

Another highlight of this trip was the accommodation.  I stayed in an apartment that was literally about a five minute walk from Pultney Bridge (annoyingly I can't remember the name of it right now but I will update this post with the name if I can find it).  It was beautifully decorated and had a great view of the city out the window.  I could literally lay in bed and see the cathedral, it was perfect.  I'd happily stay there again if it's available should I be staying in Bath in the future. 

I'm really glad I returned to this beautiful city and I've no doubt that it won't be my last visit either.  There are more memories to be created there yet.

~ Gem x

A Plan For 2019

There is no doubt about it, I definitely lost my writing mojo.  I originally started writing this post back in January (hence the title), it's crazy to think that was seven months ago already.  Back then I spent a lot of time reflecting on all that I had achieved in previous years and spent time thinking about what I wanted to achieve in 2019.  Usually I head into the year with lots of plans already made, but this year was different and I struggled to find the desire to want to do a lot.  In all honesty that feeling hasn't left me throughout the year, there is no reason for it that I can put my finger on but it is still there.  I usually find that I love having things to look forward to but recently it has made me feel so anxious. 

At the time of planning and organising something I'm excited and like the idea of what I have planned but then once it's finalised and the day gets closer I get this feeling of dread wash over me, my stomach ties itself in knots, my heart races and I want nothing more than to drop out and cancel.  This isn't the first time I have had this feeling.  It happened a few years ago when I was going through my break up with my ex-husband but it used to come and go, this year it has been constant.  The thing is I have no idea why I get it because as soon as I get to where I've planned to be I always have a great time and end up asking myself what all the fuss was about.  But that doesn't stop it happening again and again the next time I have plans to do something.  Even writing this now is making me want to be sick, I know it is silly but I just can't explain it. 

It has meant that I haven't been saying yes to things as much as I usually would.  The second year into my 40 Before 40 list wasn't anywhere near as successful as my first and I have taken far fewer photos than I usually would. 

I know I need to take control of it and push myself to do more so that the situation doesn't get any worse and I am trying.  I have started making more plans over the past couple of weeks and intend to keep doing so.  Looking back over 2019 so far I have still achieved a fair bit but I don't feel as though I have done as much as I usually have by this point in the year and I want to change that for the last four months of 2019.  I guess it is important not to compare though, we are always changing, life is always changing.  It's a journey and it's a case of seeing where it takes us.

Writing this has reminded me though how much I enjoy writing and how much I have missed it, so hopefully I will be able to continue to post more frequently. I often think whether to continue with this space here or not but I do enjoy looking back on old posts.  It's surprising how quickly we forget some of the things we do or achieve in life and the little things can easily pass us by, so being able to document things here is a good reminder.  So for now it's time for a change, and time to take control back this life of mine.

~ Gem x